During a military operation innocent people can sometimes suffer injuries or even death. This is known as collateral damage. In our lives sometimes our choices can cause collateral damage to those around us.
A drug addict can overdose and leave innocent children as orphans.
A drive by shooting can take the life of an unsuspecting bystander.
A business owner can make foolish decisions that cause his company to collapse taking away the livelihood of his employees.
A drunk driver can drive recklessly causing a crash.
A pregnant teenager can decide that abortion is the only solution.
An unhappy spouse can look outside the marriage for fulfillment and destroy a family.
"People at war with themselves will always cause collateral damage in the lives of those around them." ~ John Mark Green
My own family is dealing with collateral damage right now. The affair ended last week but the damage is catastrophic.. The other woman has moved on. The reality of her choices have sunk in. The marriage is broken beyond repair and heading towards divorce. The hurt and pain for my children is real and raw. They wrestle daily with how to process their anger. They love their Dad but they don't understand his choices. Deep inside they doubt his love for them. They question how he can claim to love them and do what he did.
"When a marriage is affected by an affair, it can be like dropping a pebble into water. The ripples of devastation grow wider and wider and can last literally for generations." ~ David & Cindy Taylor
As they look at the destruction to the world that they knew, they are confused and not sure what to do next. They are a Carlson...but what does that mean anymore? How do you put the pieces of your family back together when your Dad is not coming back home? How do you grieve the loss of someone you thought you knew?
Over time they will begin to pick up the pieces and create something new with their Dad. Right now nobody really knows what that is going to look like. How long before Dad is with someone new? Will he understand that they're not ready? Will he understand that they need more time to forgive him for the affair? Until he grasps the devastation that his choices caused in their lives, the rebuilding process cannot begin.
I am a Christian, a wife, a mom, a VBS crafter, a coupon clipper, a thrift store shopper, a football fan, a cook, a student of the Bible and an avid reader.