Sometimes you just need a good cry to relieve the stress and release frustrations. That was me tonight. I hit that point where I just had to have a little pity party and a good cry. It was fueled by a combination of exhaustion, lack of sleep and mental stress.
I just feel like I don't have enough hours in the day to get it all done. I know that I can't do it all, but finding the right balance is not easy. I'm trying to work enough to pay the bills, but not so much that I'm not available for the kids. I want the kids to do chores around the house but I don't want them to have to do it all because I'm too tired from too much work and not enough sleep.
It sucks carrying the weight of the family on my own. But right now that's what I have to do. I have to keep getting up each day and giving 110%. I don't have the luxury of being selfish or chasing my own dreams right now. I have to work hard every day to make sure that my kids have what they need. It can sometimes become overwhelming when I think about all of the "what if's" and "impossibilities".
I just have to remember that I'm not doing it alone. God is right there with me every step of the way. Only in His strength does the impossible become possible.
So every now and then I have a good cry to cleanse my soul and refresh my spirit. The tears wash away the negative thoughts and feelings. Then in my weakness I cry out to God and he lifts me up and carries me through the stressful moment or difficult day. With His help I don't have to get stuck in the negative junk. I don't have to have it all figured out. I just have to trust God one moment....one decision....one day at a time.
I must remember that I'm human and it's ok to have a melt down every once in a while. It's good to cry it out but then I must refocus of where God is leading me.
I am a Christian, a wife, a mom, a VBS crafter, a coupon clipper, a thrift store shopper, a football fan, a cook, a student of the Bible and an avid reader.